"And How Would You Like That Boyfriend Prepared Madam?"'

"My man needs to have a car, a job, his own place, no kids, lots of money and he needs to take me on vacation 2 times a year, minimum! And I don't mean a weekend at the shore! No, I mean me on a tropical beach in the Caribbean sipping frozen drinks with umbrellas in them!" "What do I do you ask? Well, I collect welfare and have 3 kids by four different men! But I am independent!!!"

Now, obviously I am exaggerating a bit here..... I mean, it is damn near impossible to have 3 kids from 4 men.... And if you do, Go see Maury NOW! You need to get that checked out.... But the rest of that comment above..... Yea, definitely not a stretch of the imagination. Women, drop dead. See, I was going to be nice and try to put your fears at ease and come to some understanding that things out here have changed. But I forget women have no sense of understanding and when it comes to what they expect a man to be, its either you come pre-packaged that way or they will try to change you into what they want.... Guess that's why I am riding solo right now. I refuse to conform to a one tracked minded person. If you want conformity from me, you need to play the give and take game. As it stands, they don't.... So, I keeps it moving..... 

Ladies, your demands and expectations of us are ridiculous. Especially you aging (27 and above with all your friends married off or having good relationships) women that feel a man has to bring 75% more into the relationship than what you bring. I am not trying to support you on the first date.... Shit, I am not trying to support you on the fifth date. Stop asking what my bank account looks like and never ask me to buy you anything aside from a pack of gum for your hot ass breath.

Let me set you straight on some topics...

Car: Its New York City.... you've gone this long without a chauffeur, why the hell should I be yours now? Catch a cab. Or be green! Take the bus or the subway. But don't look to me to drive your ass around Miss Daisy.... Gas ain't cheap and you sure don't look like you reaching for your wallet at the pump....

Job:
You know what if you find a man with a job, no matter what it may be, hold onto him.... Cause no matter what you may think, Your favorite singer/rapper/rock star/actor or whatever doesn't want you. And getting all smutted out for his show will not make you stand out in front of all the other smuts.... So maybe your dating a Security Guard.... It could be worse. He could be a shiftless asshole that does nothing all day and expects his woman to take care of him..... you know, like you expect from us... Independent my ass....

His own Place....
If your man has nothing going for himself and lives at home with his momma, its one thing..... But if the man is trying his ass off and has things going and a plan in place, cut the brother some slack. Maybe things aren't where he wants them to be at the moment..... Or maybe he knows the value of saving up for something far better than a studio apartment at $1200 a month..... So whatever it is, as long as you're able to have privacy with a good man whenever you need it, don't complain about his living situation.... ESPECIALLY IF YOU LIVE WITH YOUR MOMMA AS WELL.....

Kids
I love kids, I want kids and as much as I wish she didn't, I may wind up with a woman that already has kids. I am 30 and all those girls that got married at the dumb ass age of 21-26 that are now divorced cause he was sleeping with her sister are possibly mothers now. So, my pickings are slim when it comes to this. So ladies, guess what, for at least every one of you that has a child there is a man that has a child. So being narrow minded as to saying "he better not have any kids" makes u seem sadder and as if you were living in an unrealistic world. It also makes you hold onto men you're not sure about, but hey, at least he doesn't have kids.... A good man will take care of his children and his woman all at once. Yes, the kids may come first, but it doesn't mean you get to lose out on his love.... Its a different type of love he has for you....

Vacation....
Look... you want to go on vacation for free? Call a radio station.... See if you can guess song number 6 on the top 8 countdown.... You want a realistic approach to going away with your man.... PAY FOR YOUR SELF..... If you're not married or engaged, he is not obligated to take your ass anywhere other than home after a night out. And if he does offer to take you away, ask to pitch in for yourself.... Make yourself seem a little down to earth and not like some gold digging tramp that expects that type of treatment..... IT AIN'T GONNA HAPPEN... And trust me, you're not as good as you think, so don't think you'll be any better in Bermuda.

Basically ladies, its a difficult world. And we are all looking for some one to share these times with. And with things going the way they are, any job is a good job at the moment..... But to exclude some one from possibly entering your life because they do not meet your oh so high standards, well, maybe your losing out on more than you know. And please, if your going to make these demands of your significant other, make sure your house, or your mommas house, is in order. Cause believe me, there's women out there that have it together and know how to accept a man for who he is and not what he can offer them.

Talk to you soon.....

***Check out my Food Blog at The Best of The Bronx